A Christmas with Two Carols by Marian Casillas, Ed.D.

 







A Christmas with two Carols by Marian Casillas, Ed.D.

 

Carol came home after her abortion and lay down to rest in the middle of the day, it had been an exhausting endeavor but that was the end of that.

She fell asleep; it was a deep and profound sleep that enveloped her.

In her dream, she was inside an abortion clinic, but this time she stood next to a sonogram machine and saw the image of a baby. The abortionist rushed in quickly and began the procedure on a woman she recognized as herself. She heard someone reassure her, “It will be over soon.”

As Carol stood there watching the image on the sonogram she had the horrifying realization that she was watching her baby being aborted. She wanted to look away but she found herself glued to the screen. Yes, it was over.

She thought to herself, I want to leave this place, please take me away from here. She heard the reply to her request, “Not until you see everything.”

The baby body parts were placed into plastic bags to be sold for research experimentation or for organ transplants. She could read the label on each bag: HEART, BRAIN, EYES, LIVER, and KIDNEYS. 

The lab technicians were discussing plans about where they were going to eat lunch after they finished. How revolting she thought to herself and fled to find the restroom so she could vomit.

Next in her dream, she was inside a church; she was seated in the front row of a wedding ceremony.

The music started, she turned back to see the bride accompanied by her father walking down the aisle. They reached the front of the altar and the father kissed her daughter and went to sit down next to Carol. He gave her a gentle squeeze on her hand. Carol thought to herself, “This must be my husband and the bride must be my daughter.”

After the ceremony the bride came over to Carol and kissed her and whispered in her ear, “Thank you for giving me life, you’re the best mother in the world!”

Carol just stood there confused and conflicted, “This can’t possibly be, I’m not married and I just aborted by daughter.”

Next in her dream, she was inside a home beautifully decorated for the Christmas season: a large Christmas tree, a warm fireplace, and everyone opening their gifts. She was seated next to a man she recognized from the “wedding dream” was her husband, with a few more wrinkles, and a lot more gray hair, but still very handsome.

Over there was her daughter and son-in-law, handing a present to whom she presumed to be their daughter. Carol’s daughter smiled as she read the card on the Christmas gift, “To Carol, With Love Your Grandma Carol.”

With regret and remorse, Carol found herself engulfed in a stream of tears profusely flowing from her eyes because this would never be happening in real life.

Her daughter came over to console her. Carol looked into her daughter’s eyes and told her how sorry she was because she had aborted her.

Her daughter lovingly took her mother’s hand and gently whispered in her ear, “I’m Christy your second daughter, you aborted my older sister, but she’ll always be with us. I named my daughter after you because I want her to know how much you loved me to give me this wonderful life that I have.”

Little Carol came over and lovingly hugged her Grandma Carol, “Thank you for being my Grandma, and I’m so happy I have your name.”  

When Carol woke up she realized that what had begun as a nightmare, miraculously turned into a most joyful and glorious of Christmas celebrations with her loving family: her husband, her daughter, her son-in-law and her granddaughter.

This Christmas was indeed a dream come true. Carol loved her life! A life Carol could never have imagined in all her wildest dreams.

 

- Marian Casillas, Ed.D.